Some claim the most powerful thing in the universe is LOVE. I find I am constantly seeking out what that ‘word’ or that ‘feeling’ really is.

I went to a seminar at the University of Calgary a few years ago where Tom Campbell did an incredible job of explaining it from a science based perspective. He claims that the energy of fear (which is what the world is naturally designed around-Entropy-a gradual decline into disorder) creates chaos in our lives, and the energy of love creates the opposite-Unity. That if we base decisions on fear the result is chaos and if we base decisions on love it creates unity. How do I know if my decision is based on love? Is it a feeling? Is it listening to my intuition? Or is it the absence of fear?

Matt Kahn is one of my favourite spiritual teachers. He’s funny, quirky and makes you feel better about yourself and the world. In his teachings he says that the soul’s version of love is the balance of support and honour for yourself and others. He says that we are also challenged with the ego’s version of love which is based on ecstasy and euphoria. The ego’s version is one where you seek a ‘high’ outside of yourself. It’s the new car, the favourite shirt, the best tasting food. The souls version of love is always discerning how to be supportive of self and others and how to balance that with honouring your needs and the needs of others. Great concept, but to connect to this and create it is the complicated part! It means pissing people off, standing up for what you believe in and following through with the ‘hard decisions’ that not everyone is going to enjoy or believe in.

As I write this I’m sitting in a cafe in Luang Prabang- a UNESCO world heritage site in Laos. One of the draws to this beautiful place is the temples and the practices of the Buddhist Monks. In the years that Laos has become ‘travel friendly’ they have found a strong interest from the tourists to witness the ‘Buddhist Alms Ceremony’ called ‘Tak Bet’. Each morning at sunrise, you hear the drums beat and the Buddhist Monks march down the street in bare feet to collect their daily offerings of rice and humble offerings of foods from the locals. They fill their pails full as the people sit on the street and wait to honour them with their daily token of gratitude and appreciation. This is a very sacred, very special ceremony to be witness to. I read about the rules to follow beforehand- you must dress to cover your knees and shoulders. You should never be higher than head level with the monks. If you want to participate, you are allowed to, just as long as it means something to you. If you want to watch, you must remain on the other side of the street. Do not talk to the monks, do not use a flash if you take pictures and remain silent.

As I stand on the other side of the road with sleepy eyes, I get excited and a bit emotional when I see the lineup of monks and the stools filled with people ready to bless them with offerings. My emotion moves quickly from my heart to the pit of my stomach as the disrespect and complete lack of honour overtake the streets I stand on. Tourists start running up to the monks, putting their cameras in their faces and with a flash they change the sacredness of this event. I saw a couple sitting on the stools (these stools are made available for offering blessings of food to the monks) taking selfies and completely unknowing to the fact that their empty hands are shedding further honour. As the ceremony continued I looked at the faces of the monks and not once did I see them give a look of judgement or sneak an eye of anger at the tourists. As it continues, I watch them give offerings of food back to the poor as children line the streets with empty plastic bags and hopeful eyes. Will my family eat today? My heart pours out to the monk and the child as they exchange a look of adoration and exchange of food. My head turns and I see tourists running down the road to get the best picture, knocking one of the monks over with their eager hands and focused lens, as they fight for the best shot. Meanwhile, locals being too polite to say or do anything but feeling just as uncomfortable as I am.

The Buddhists are known for practicing loving-kindness also known as “Metta”. Is this the ultimate challenge they face every day as the sun rises? I was upset for the rest of the day (and still am) as I wonder where our values have gone. Is ignorance the new norm? The ego’s version of love was ever present as I felt the polarity of the desires of the tourists and the heart centered focus of the monks.

What can be done to restore honour? To support this practice of faith and community connection? I wish there was a button I could push to reset this ceremonies sacredness.

I sit and ponder, what is the most loving thing to do? Do I ignore my anger? Offer loving-kindness as the monks seemed to do seamlessly? For now, I pray for each of us to be truly seen without the need of a camera lens and for compassion to clear my cloud of anger.

If we are all interconnected, then is this a wake up call that are we ruining our inner sacredness? Are we in need of healing our values by dropping the excessive desire to get the bigger better for humble connections with our community and being kind and present with ourselves and others?

Metta~loving-kindness